By Jove but the Fawcett Ambassadors are a most talented bunch of rapscallions!
That most estimable ‘land pirate’, Mr Russell Bristow, certainly has a gift for winning Moustache Championships across the wide, and indeed, wild world. The fellow is utterly resolute when it comes to the art of ‘Keeping A Stiff Upper Lip Regardless’. The man is a fearless arborist (tree surgeon to those who successfully evaded the torment of a classical education, ahem) and most stylish skateboarder to boot. But though the fellow doesn’t show it, he’s a first class poet! So I thought blow it, everyone should know it…
I hereby share the tale of a ‘tache…
My Moustache Story
Me and my moustache, well we’ve been a team,
Since late September twenty thirteen.
We’ve grown and twisted,
Pulled, curled and even used glue.
Neither me or my moustache had a clue what to do.
We carried on regardless,
Entered a competition.
We won no prizes,
But now had a mission.
Training and grooming is what was needed,
As the competition calendar duly proceeded.
A couple more comps came and went,
Before my time on the podium would be spent.
Circus strong man to dapper gent, crossed stares and funny looks.
Next come the photoshoots, magazine interviews and hardback books.
Also a sponsor who would of thought it!
And only the best one it’s captain Fawcett!
Off to the world championships with my lover and friends,
I couldn’t could I,
I guess it depends.
I’ve got the suit, the tie, and the hat.
So I guess that’s that!
With a kick and a slap and a pat on the back,
My turn had come I was first in the pack.
My appearance on stage came and went in a flash,
So I’m off the bar three sour mash!
The wait makes me restless and slightly mean,
I cant seem to keep my eyes off the big screen.
There’s your name!
What? What do you mean?
It’s up there look! Under the beam!
So now look at me I’m fit to burst,
That means top three at worst.
And then they tell me you’re world champion number one!
Err Thanks dad and probably mum.
So there you have it,
That’s my little story.
About me, my moustache and world championship glory.
By Russell Bristow
Remember chums, if you’ve been inspired by Russell’s wordsmithery, do send in your own memories, rhymes, essay, musings, jottings, sketches and scribblings. Perchance you shall see your thoughts immortalised in print amid the pages of The Fawcett Times autumn edition.
Photo Credit: Liam Oaks